Another Lost Souls WriteUp
Write-Up Run No 1227 – Silver Fox Ranch 
Saturday 6th January 2001
Hare: Silver Fox (Archie Loper)

Lost in Loperville.

Word had been spreading throughout the Bangkok Hashing community that the near-legendary Silver Fox was to set another run at his country estate in Cholburi.  Those of us who recalled last year's extravaganza knew this was an event not to be missed.  With this in mind, I instructed my faithful knave Edward to convey me to the runsite in style.  Unfortunately, the only vehicle left in my extensive garage was a Jeep Cherokee which I had won in a card game last year with Lord Lucan.  (I had wagered a roller skate with three wheels against the motor car which his lordship had described as "displaying craftsmanship to rank with the Ford Edsel"). The absence of my other motors being due to their having been "loaned" to my old friend Khun Taksin (or "Sin" as I like to call him) to assist in his electioneering efforts.  The old boy being a bit short of transport these days.  Something to do with his driver claiming ownership of all of the cars.

Nonetheless, slumming it is what the Hash is all about, and so I arrived the Loper estates in time for the run, quickly alighted from the car and milled about next to Richard Ramsden's Land Rover in the hope that people would think I had come in that. Following a short transfer from the parking area to the runsite, the hare provided his instructions: some checks were to be 250m deep.  This caused some consternation among those hashers for whom 250m is more than they like to run in total!  This trepidation notwithstanding, we set off at a brisk pace (brisk for the BH3 that is - something approaching the speed with which your asthmatic grandmother used to circumambulate the retirement home grounds after a 3-sherry lunch). 

Immediate leadership was provided by the GM who strode confidently off along the in-trail.  Eventually he deigned to join the rest of us and I for one felt the power of his presence as he led manfully from the rear.  Repeatedly endangering his own life by taking the shortest, easiest route between checks, he selflessly allowed his pack to follow paper alone.  No glory-hogging front running for this GM! No Sir!

Back with the action, the GM's advance scouts rapidly discovered the Hare's cunning plan; each check was set so as to be broken easily but each such easily-found trail was false.  Thus it only required one to stand at the check, spot the first paper and then run in the opposite direction to find the real trail. This, of course, confused the likes of Bushman, who dutifully ran each false trail; a testament to the Teutonic ability to follow orders.  In this, Bushman was ably assisted by Marc Lavoie: a testament to the Gallic ability to run around like idiots before surrendering.

The trail basically followed a right hand loop through farmland and fields that the hare has chosen specifically for the fact that they had been torn up by buffalos during the last wet season and now hardened into uneven crater-filled moonscapes.  Thanks Archie!

In the end, front-runners were in within one hour and the rest of the pack (including several members of the fairer sex) were in in about 1 and 1/2. All proclaimed it a good run and set about the business of heavy drinking with the kind of gusto that makes Hashers such welcome and delightful companions at all manner of social events.  Max edified drinkers with his analysis of the beer industry in Thailand, notably, "Beer Chang is crap but everybody drinks it because it is cheap".  True enough, but has anyone ever bothered to divide the bug's consumption every Hash by the fees he pays to ascertain his cost per bottle of Heineken?

The GM then took us upstairs for a circle which featured down-downs for all the usual offences except those committed by the Turks in Cyprus. It was then downstairs for a sumptuous (and subsidised) banquet laid on by the hare.  This included Beaujolais Nouveau for the gullible victims of French marketing and an Australian Chardonnay which the hare kindly donated for the consumption of his fellow hashers because he felt it was spoiled.  Thanks Archie!

Following dinner, the party continued in the Loper mansion where the Johnny Cash CD has everybody up and dancing.  I left around 1.30am with the party still happening.  However, if anyone asks, both my driver, Khun Edward, and myself stayed all night, hence our late return home on Sunday.  Got it??